Are you freakin' kidding me?

So, I have tried home bikini waxing before (abrupt change in blog tone, anyone?).  It didn't go well.  It just became a glob of hot wax mixed with hairs that refused to come out and me pulling, pulling, pulling at my skin, trying to figure out how to get the wax off without tearing off my flesh.  It turns out you have to let the wax cool.  OH. MY. GOD.  Had I known that this, THIS tiny little change in behavior could have saved me the mind-numbing agony of yanking warm, sticky wax off my very sensitive bikini area...oh, not to mention that I bought no fewer than 3 separate d-i-y bikini waxing kits.  Sheesh.

I suppose it could just be that (a) I didn't read the directions and (b) I did not have any hands-on experience with at-home waxing growing up.  Not that I can really blame my Mom for not explaining the intricacies of at-home bikini area care*.  I mean, really--who wants to think of their mother in this context?  And for anyone out there thinking, "Well, your children need to develop a healthy understanding of sex and sexuality," I firmly believe that no good really comes of thinking about your mother's goodies attracting any sort of attention.

*She did, on the other hand, repeatedly stress the importance of not shaving our diego mustaches because they would grow back thicker.